“Fierce love. It’s the best way I can describe the way I love her (Corrie). It’s a gift I can only truly understand when I look at my God – who fiercely loved. Not willing to leave me in my sin but provide a way out by giving up His life for me. I have a wired instinct to love and pour my life out for her and I KNOW who that is suppose to look like. Jesus. Jesus created motherhood to look like him and I have never been more privileged to follow in his footsteps in this way. Being a mother is being broken and poured out – it’s love. It’s being Jesus. Corrie, it is my great honor to use my life to ensure that you know HIS life. Happy Mother’s day friends! You have a high calling!“Mother’s Day Instagram post 2019
This is the post I wrote on my Instagram on Mother’s Day of this year (2019). It perfectly reflects the burning heart I know every mom has for her children. It’s basically instinctual. There is a reason we moms are often referred to as “Mama Bears.” This paragraph above culminates what I want my motherhood to show. I want it to reflect Jesus, and I see how even in the way He created me as a woman, it was made to showcase Himself.
I have been struck with another aspect of this as we step into life with a child who will have more physical needs than most children. Instead of adding to my picture-perfect family with another spunky, free child with a normal birth and exceptional learning skills – we will be adding to our family what is not expected. What is vulnerable. What is weak. What is abnormal.
Most people, even me, react first with pity. But can I shift our hearts just a bit to remember our Father’s heart?
Where did Jesus tell us to go in being Christians? To the low places. What did Jesus say was the most “happy” or “blessed” state to be in? The poor, the mourning, the meek, the hungry, those who step up for peace, those who offer mercy, those who are persecuted. The vulnerable, the people with need and lack. I am reminded over and over in the scriptures below of what our Father’s heart burns deeply for. Why? Because it is only those who NEED Him, that will find Him. He knows that He can satisfy ALL desires and needs. Where does He send His children in his instructions on what our life should look like? The places of need.
Our Father’s heart is burning for those who need Him. He wants our hearts to deeply love and go there too. Is it comfortable? Is is natural? Sometimes no. But is it what will show the world that something else is directing our life? YES. Our lives are not about ourselves and what HE sees as significant is what WE see as significant. Those who need Him.
The world tells us that we should have aborted our little Anna because fighting for her life will completely alter our own. My natural human instinct wants to run away from pain and suffering too. But my God, who knew me, a rebellious, broken nobody, saw me as significant and embraced with joy the pain and suffering it took to redeem me (Hebrews 12:1-2). Do we see ourselves as “the redeemed handicapped?” Because that’s what we all were (or are). Those who have a need that we can’t fix on our own. Someone else had to fight for us. Do we see ourselves and our families as gifts of GRACE. Something we never deserved. Something only meant to show His goodness and not ours.
Our family may not look “normal.” It may not be Instagram-perfect for this world. But Oh LORD, may it reflect the absolute beauty and heart of the greater Kingdom we live for. May it show the heart of our Father who fiercely loves the unlovable! Oh Jesus, may your heart for us wretched sinners shine through. You perfectly satisfy, you perfectly redeem. May Anna’s life showcase all our need and remind us what showcases the Father most. Are you going to the low places? He came to the low places for you.
“If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person’s religion is worthless. Religion that is pure and undefiled before God the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.” James 1:26-27
“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
“Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.
“Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.
“Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.
“Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy. (Those who give/deny self, what is not deserved to give)
“Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God. (Those who deny self to be unstained)
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God. (Those who make themselves vulnerable to make peace)
“Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
“Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you.” Matthew 5:3-11
“Is not this the fast that I choose:
to loose the bonds of wickedness,
to undo the straps of the yoke,
to let the oppressed go free,
and to break every yoke?
Is it not to share your bread with the hungry
and bring the homeless poor into your house;
when you see the naked, to cover him,
and not to hide yourself from your own flesh?
Then shall your light break forth like the dawn,
and your healing shall spring up speedily;
your righteousness shall go before you;
the glory of the Lord shall be your rear guard.
Then you shall call, and the Lord will answer;
you shall cry, and he will say, ‘Here I am.’
If you take away the yoke from your midst,
the pointing of the finger, and speaking wickedness,
if you pour yourself out for the hungry
and satisfy the desire of the afflicted,
then shall your light rise in the darkness
and your gloom be as the noonday.
And the Lord will guide you continually
and satisfy your desire in scorched places
and make your bones strong;
and you shall be like a watered garden,
like a spring of water,
whose waters do not fail.”